Snoring On A Resume?


That special someone in my life has been dealing with a sore back.  Unfortunately, several nights this week, including tonight, his sleep has been interrupted, so I took this as my cue to take my “soft feminine type” snoring self to my computer for a while in hopes he is able to hook back up with the sand man very soon.  I would stay in there and try to tough it out but when you’re in bed with someone that can’t sleep, and that someone has a very hard time convincing themselves that being in bed with someone that can sleep just shouldn’t be a part of the plan, it’s time to boogie.  Sunday night was the first of several the insomnia would pay us a visit and oh, what a learning experience it was for me.  Now I know, retreating to a completely different room at precisely the right moment is definitely in my best interest.  Let me explain.  I was apparently laying flat on my back.  I was probably dreaming that I was arm knitting a scarf made out of yarn I bought from a leprechaun and I had no idea my other half was awake and all of a sudden he made a successful attempt to wake me from my snoring slumber  by giving me a gentle nudge but instead my brain translated it as someone trying to tell me the house was on fire!  After the initial shock of being woke up from a very sound sleep, I allowed my heart rate to return to normal, checked to make sure neither he nor I were actually on fire and then performed a complete investigation of the house after I piled out of bed and walked rather abruptly down the hall muttering something like, “You won’t be getting another chance to do that in the near future because I will be sleeping on the couch!” I often wonder if it is at all possible to wake someone from a sound sleep like that without causing them to be violently alarmed.  From my experience, I have not yet seen a different reaction than mine, ever.  Usually I’m not the “huffy” type but that night, I had a wrong way and it got rubbed!  Apparently I was emitting a very soft, feminine, almost undetectable amount of noise that some might refer to as snoring.  I’m not sure why women hate to believe they snore but according to my source, I do and it doesn’t appear to be all that soft or feminine and it’s safe to say I could add it to my resume as it is allegedly something I’m quite good at!  He snores a lot but I’ve trained my brain to interpret it as one of those soothing sounds you would hear on one of those relaxation cd’s.  It works great and it requires no batteries, no electricity and it’s very reliable….that is, if it doesn’t have insomnia!


4 responses to “Snoring On A Resume?”

  1. I also snore I’ve been told…
    It must be better lately because he hasn’t said anything or got up in the nite because of it…(lol)

  2. I’ve been told I also snore….
    It must be pretty good lately…
    He hasn’t gotten out of bed or made any comments about it…lol

  3. Good morning Bev! So glad to see you are FINALLY writing!!! Totally enjoy your unique sense of humor and your awesome outlook on life!! You keep going girl!! Love you!

  4. I laughed out loud Beverly! Especially when you mentioned the Leprechaun! I love to read your posts! This is a great idea!

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