There’s nothing more frustrating than thinking you have all the ingredients for something you plan to make only to discover, after a thorough investigation, that one of the key ingredients is missing! What you are about to read transpired out of my desire to create a 9 x 13 inch pan of the moistest, fudgiest unfrosted brownies in the world and the eminent danger the much needed chocolate chips were in.
Years ago I was married to a chocoholic. I tried to keep those adorable little fun size candy bars well stocked but when the day to replenish the stash inched closer I should have known the chocolate chips weren’t safe. I never came to the conclusion I should be hiding them or perhaps find a less likely place for them like the oven drawer or under the sink or maybe even out in the trunk of my car so I suppose part of what happened was actually my fault. As a matter of fact, I even remember telling the chocoholic I planned to whip up a pan of Dump Bars the following day so he knew there was, indeed, chocolate, somewhere. That was a huge mistake.
Some time passed and I got distracted folding some laundry and as I was heading to the bathroom to put the towels away I ran across Christopher Columbus just after he made his discovery! The chocoholic was standing in the kitchen, the cupboard door was open hiding his face and I said, “What are you doing? You’re not eating the chocolate chips, are you?” At first I heard the rustling of plastic and an arm reaching into the cupboard followed by a very unconvincing “No.” I walked over to him and removed the open bag of chocolate chips from the shelf they had just been slid onto. I walked over to the drawer and pulled out the scotch tape. I placed a small piece across the very small “4 chips at a time” size hole the bag was baring and I said, “I’m hiding these!”
Unfortunately the house wasn’t that big and making an attempt to hide something at that particular moment was quite ridiculous. The chocoholic followed my every move and due to the fact it was nearly time for bed I took them with me into the bedroom and crawled under the covers and waited for him to retreat. I didn’t plan on falling asleep but the next thing I knew, it was morning and you can imagine my surprise when I woke up wondering what the lump was that was fighting for the same spot on the mattress as my ribs. I rolled over and saw the bag of chocolate chips. Well, I thought to myself, I guess I kept them safe from the chocoholic after-all!
I had to chuckle and when I picked them up, however, as I realized they were no longer chocolate “chips.” During the night I unknowingly rolled on top of them and the nice warm body blanket they were covered with melted them completely and turned them into a solid bar of chocolate! My mission to save the chocolate chips failed miserably. The end result yielded one candy bar back in the stash and zero chocolate chips to dump on the dump bars!
I’ve decided to include the recipe for these incredibly easy and delicious brownies. You can actually make them without chocolate chips but then you’ll feel the need to frost them and that just makes for more dirty dishes and more work and more ingredients you’ll have to find.
Dump Bars
Dump 2 cups sugar, 5 eggs, 1 cup vegetable oil and 1 teaspoon of vanilla into a bowl and stir until well blended. Add 1 1/3 cups flour, 1/2 cup cocoa and 1 teaspoon salt and mix just until all dry ingredients are moistened. Dump the batter into a 9×13 pan that has been sprayed with non-stick cooking spray or call upon your fairy godmother and ask her to bring her non-stick cooking wand. (In order for that to make sense you might want to read my “Non Stick Cooking Wand” written earlier.) Sprinkle the batter with chocolate chips or get creative and use 2 or 3 different kinds of chips. Bake at 350 degrees for 30-35 minutes or until the brownies begin to pull away from the sides of the pan. Cool and enjoy! I guarantee your chocoholic will absolutely LOVE these easy treats even if the chunks of chocolate you dump on them no longer resemble perfectly formed little drops of chocolate!