I’m not sure why but for as long as I can remember I find myself making attempts to discover what lies beyond the  surface of the people I know, the people I meet and the people I love.  I always wonder what actually makes them tick.  The ones that warrant the bulk of my attention are the angry ones and the dreamers.

My dad was one of the angry ones.  I’m thankful that God gave me just over 40 years to ponder the reasons why he seemed so angry and over the course of those 40 years I learned that he really wasn’t angry at all.  He was wounded.  He had to say goodbye to his mom when he was 5 years old as cancer treatments weren’t nearly as advanced back then as they are now.  He found out very quickly that nothing in his life would ever be the same.  I’ll never forget the day he opened up to me in his room at the nursing home.  He told me he built a shield of armor around himself many, many years ago and there was no way anyone, and he emphasized ANYONE, would be able to hurt him.  He learned that he would probably always have to rely on himself and that is how he perceived his future.   I miss my dad.  He was stern and sometimes scary in the eyes of a little kid, especially when some of his “pain” slipped out.  We heard it loudly and clearly but we respected him.  He always made us feel safe and always provided for us no matter how hard it was as we were growing up.  I loved my dad and as I savor the memories of his presence in my life I’ve realized just how much he loved me too.

I work with a young gal and she would fall into the category of the dreamers.  As I mentioned earlier, dreamers are also souls that warrant the bulk of my attention.  I met her nearly three years ago and I’ll never forget that day.  She was assigned to help me cover all of my working surfaces in my frame shop with cardboard so that over time, as the cardboard got worn and torn, it could be easily replaced.  I knew the very second I met her that she had a story that I wanted to know.

We opened our brand new store at the very end of October back in 2015.  Veronica was chosen to work as a framer in my shop but over time we realized her potential for success would be much better recognized helping customers out on the floor.  She has an incredible desire to help others and she’ll stop at almost nothing to help a customer find exactly what they are looking for.  The relationship I have with her has evolved greatly over the past three years but it wasn’t until recently that I was able to understand what makes her “tick.”

She has always been notorious for blurting out things almost as if she has started a conversation in her head a bit before she starts talking.  I hate to say it but there have been times that this has caused me a bit of frustration.  Because it appeared to be happening more and more I finally decided I needed to stop her and back her up a bit.  She never took offense but rather giggled and helped me to understand what she had originally been trying to communicate.  The process of stopping her and backing her up went on for quite some time and I couldn’t help but think there was more to her story and that perhaps, if I was patient, she may just offer me yet another chapter.

I suppose it was a couple of months ago now that Veronica appeared to be spending more time in the frame shop visiting with me when she had a few extra minutes and there is one day, in particular, that I will never forget as long as I live.  This was the day the beautiful dreamer revealed a very important link that made every bit of her “dreaminess” amazingly clear.

I’m not sure how we got on the subject of her parents but I knew from past conversations that she and they were never close.  She remembers her dad making fun of her and pointing out her flaws.  She never sees him as she has no desire to make that drive to the prison he’s locked up in.  Her mother has always pretty much hated her.  She never had enough to eat and always had to look after her little brothers so her mom could enjoy her freedom.

As I made an attempt to digest the horrific childhood this dear sweet gal had experienced, I found myself wondering just how a child is able to triumph over such heart wrenching circumstances.  My mom was my most favorite person on the face of this earth.  Her love was some of the most beautiful love I would ever know and the thought of never having experienced this was nearly unfathomable for me.   I knew I had to ask Veronica how she was able to survive in a home without love and when I did this was her response.  “I created an imaginary friend.  I named her Anna Mae.  I talked to her.  I loved her and she loved me.”  At that moment I think my heart stopped beating.  Everything about this young girl finally made sense.  The conversations she appeared to have always started before she opened her mouth stemmed from all those years when she had conversations with Anna Mae.

Veronica is a delightful person.  You would never see any of the pain that must exist in her somewhere if you ever had the pleasure of meeting her.  She works harder than anyone I know and is one of the most resilient souls I have ever met.  She could be bitter but she isn’t.  She could be angry but she isn’t.  She could have been someone just like the two people that created her but in her case two wrongs definitely made one right.